Thursday, December 31, 2009

Mixed Emotions

"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those crushed in spirit"
Psalm 34:18

I'm sure from the verse you can tell I'm feeling pretty down.  We had a great Christmas and I only broke down once as thoughts of Evan came to my mind. Today though is much different. I think it's been building. In exactly three hours, in China it will be Evans birthday. We are not with him. We do not know when we will be with him. He knows we are coming but does not know when. I'm sure he is wondering what is taking so long.

At some point in the night while we are sleeping our guy will be celebrating his birthday with all of his friends. This year he will have a cake and presents to open. He has a family that misses him so much and would do anything to jump on a plane to bring him home today if they could.

I feel like our agency has let us down. They have poo pooed my questions stating they would get back to me asap. That was well over three weeks ago. We have paid them enough money to answer our questions in a timely manor and with honesty. They have cost us numerous delays in this adoption process.

Now I do believe everything happens for a reason and God is in control. What I do not believe in is incompetence! When the same problems and errors continue to occur with more than one family, then there is a problem that needs addressing. Right now I am angry and sad!

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6 comments:

  1. Your agency may have let you down, but God has not. As difficult as it is, try to cling to that as you await the last leg of your journey to Evan.

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  2. I understand your pain & frustration. We had a lot of issues with our 2nd adoption (same agency) and we complained to the CEO and we did get money back. You should address your concerns to someone higher because from what I've been reading on the boards, a lot of families have not been getting answers. They are supposed to be working for you. I'm prayng for you. Praying you can get answers and find peace. Yes, God's plan is much bigger than ours. And you will be with your son soon. But I also understand how badly you want to be with him NOW! Praying your miracle will come soon.

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  3. {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

    You know I feel the same way about much of what you said. Please call or email if you need to vent to someone else who gets all too well what you're saying. I cannot believe what they did to us 12/18 LOAers (and it sounds like you too with all of the paperwork stuff) and basically just left for 2 weeks and said, "It's Christmas. Deal"

    Well, it is Christmas but we cannot CONTROL when they sent our LOAs!!! Ugh! I'm angry with you. And I cannot believe what is over there on the board; they'll wish they'd not turned off moderation. Can you imagine being a family considering starting again with them and reading all of that???

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  4. I so understand how your heart aches for
    your son to be home with his family.
    I will be praying for you!
    We have been VERY unhappy with our agency.
    Dh and I were just discussing all that took place
    this time around and we are very upset.

    {{{Hugs}}}

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  5. {HUG}

    I am praying for you. Hugging you virtually on this day as well...I so wish I could hug you in person.

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  6. You've been in my thoughts and prayers all day long. I pray Monday holds very good news for you!

    "Weeping my last for the night; but a shout of joy comes in the morning."
    Psalm 30-5

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